Chan Ho Park's diarrhea
This video makes "diarrhea" the first Google suggestion after "Chan Ho Park" and features a giggling Mariano Rivera.
Stephany Lee is kicked off the team
Stephany Lee had to miss the Olympics after testing positive for marijuana. She said she thought she stopped smoking in time that it wouldn't show up in a drug test. Her words, with the benefit on hindsight, on The Times's London blog: "I’m disappointed for the people I’ve let down that have been behind me. I’m sad. I could have stopped earlier. I could have prevented this." She could have stopped earlier — not stopped entirely to preserve her eligibility, mind you. Just a week or so earlier. You can tell how much that Olympic spot meant to her.
Shaq flashes his wit
When he wasn't playing "Miami Vice," Shaquille O'Neal won a press conference. This could be seen as a stand-in for the many great press conferences that have come after sporting events.
Donovan McNabb plays to win
This one almost doesn't count, but Donovan McNabb, a 10-year veteran at the time, said after his Eagles played to a tie that he "never even knew that was in the rule book." Looking at his grave and judging it a bit shallow, he added, "I hate to see what would happen in the Super Bowl and in the playoffs."
Trailing Dave Winfield
Presumably having seen "Pink Flamingos" and decided he could easily top Divine, Yankees owner George Steinbrenner paid a man to dig up dirt on one of his own players (and favorite piñata), Dave Winfield. The move got him banned from baseball for life, although the life in question was apparently that of a Madagascar hissing cockroach: two years.
Dave Winfield, menace to animals
The detective incident (rightly) gets more attention, but this is perhaps the best representation of Dave Winfield's tenure with the Yankees. In 1983, Dave Winfield accidentally killed a seagull while tossing a ball during warm-ups. After the game, he was arrested and charged with cruelty to animals. His own manager, Billy Martin, said: "They say he hit the gull on purpose. They wouldn't say that if they'd seen the throws he'd been making all year. It's the first time he's hit the cutoff man." The charges were dropped.
Ronaldo and the prostitutes
In reporting on an incident in which Ronaldo ended up with three male prostitutes dressed as women, a lot of outlets mentioned perceived similarities with an old Eddie Murphy story, and most of the coverage focused on the fact that the prostitutes were biologically male. Somehow, no one seemed to comment on the fact that Ronaldo was going around picking up three prostitutes at once. This seems more relevant to me.
